What’ll I Do?

Posted: September 13, 2017 in Uncategorized

What’ll I do if I don’t do you?
What happens left to my own devices?

When you finally stop there you are
it’s laughable and it’s frightening.

Noise in my head floods the silence
thick atmosphere sealing shut a vacuum.

Unable to seek out new distraction
nature hobbles us to preempt experience.

Denying the truth takes too much effort
weakness and old age prep us for acceptance.

Never is not an option where eternity is concerned
if we are late we can only offer our apology.

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Motion Is Risky

Posted: September 6, 2017 in Uncategorized

The more things change the more precious the past
this lifelong life loses luster as the story evolves
characters come and go there is no plot
there is no safety take it as it comes
or take it in the rear.

The present unfolds in time-lapse images
every minute is fraught with possibility
everything can come crashing down
everything can get better
nothing will remain this way beyond today.

It all just keeps moving
and motion is risky in a finite world
there are consequences to velocity
casualties may ensue
imagination may get us through.

Mind In Neutral

Posted: September 3, 2017 in Uncategorized

Say it out loud reprimand yourself
get your shit together
if you don’t do it who will it’s up to you
it’s always been up to you
     so it all comes down to me
     we is just a bunch of me’s

The system was supposed to support us
there were supposed to be safeguards
but there were never guarantees
no such thing we signed on anyway
     I was confident
     I thought we had a better solution
     a truer truth

The more we knew the more there was to question
answers are slippery and subjective things
truths few and far between
facts get in the way
     too many to count too many to know
     but truth … that’s when you step outside the circle
     walk off into the dark open your arms
     unlock your heart and put your mind in neutral

The Same Center of Another Place

Posted: September 2, 2017 in Uncategorized

Pain always takes center stage
steps right up head of the line
elbows aside the nice stuff
plops itself down refuses to budge.

Try to overcome pain with kindness
try hard to remember the good things
some things you don’t forget
cracked vases tottering on shelves.

Stop trying to take inventory
better just to burn down the house
anoint yourself with ash dance round the fire
now the same center of another place.

Let It Come

Posted: September 1, 2017 in Uncategorized

I deploy delusions to keep the fear away
Yet I can see clearly what I’ve become
It fills me with neither despair nor satisfaction
My heartbeat fading like fleeing footfalls

Yet I remain calm and stationary
And I do not cry out

If pain is coming let it come
It has followed me down these rutted roads
The rearview mirror does not lie but the view is limited
Clarity comes when you stop

I just wanted to have a good time
I didn’t want anything to hurt

She Became a Stranger

Posted: August 30, 2017 in Uncategorized

She became stranger and stranger
She became a stranger

A recipient a victim of referred tenderness
The kind that has its roots in pain

An embrace was like slow suffocation
A collision of skeletal and muscular infrastructure

Tender nerve endings trying to avoid one another
Too much touch too much toxicity

Red heart mottled with purple bruises
Hence the tears of blood

We dried one another’s

She Thrives On Dysfunction

Posted: August 25, 2017 in Uncategorized

She thrives on dysfunction it’s in her blood
She was nourished on it it affirms her
The chaos she creates insulates
A toxic brew in which to stew
A flavor all its own a bitter blend
An acquired taste like pain or pleasure

Like finding a comfortable position on a bed of nails
Or affirmation in the arms of a stranger
Such thirst is only quenched with tears
The familiarity and the unhappiness
Become a kind of refuge become the family way
It’s a legacy she did not refuse